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Reflections
These poems are completely amateur so please don't judge too harshly. I could find no way of straight writing and kept deleting my efforts. The poems seems to be sticking. 

Keys, Phone, Anxiety

10/22/2020

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Fetch eyes mind the black coal walls 
blocking stars, crawls across  glass  telescope shards
shocking locked continents apart.
Oceans  infinite deep tears cried,
from a billion child's eyes  dried.

Dark impaired,  ink dry. Sand parched ,
Like the bones of ancient scrolls skin-pulled 
like a skin canvas across rib valleys and child hide. 
Dissolve like dust bowls  on a clown terror ride.
In a cattle truck clinging  a tiny child 's side. 

​






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Steps from the precipice

10/14/2020

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Mule rising   foolish raining beer rivers staining shoes
shaking , changing drinking gears grinding through grieving 
heaving, hulking foolish memory shoulders, grounded fallen
onto gravelled,  sodden drunken swirling bodies, flung
in  twirling circles, dancing from bars to pubs to 
bum haunts  and dumps, raise the bar with a bar tab
tip the waitress  while she waits   to escape ,
racing to skate  by, delivering shots of fire
or fizzy amber globules like lamp shades ,
​displaying an insincere   smile whilst 
males gazing through Mule haze,
brazen, squint eyes trained
making a paltry 
mosquito swipe at
an amber beer
stain.
Aim. 
Aim.
Aim.
Aim again, this time connecting,
realising the rejection after being rejected again. 
Hit the road, this time connecting with  head   and chin.  That's enough its time to reverse and run like the wind. 

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    by Paul Sinclair


    This journal confronts childhood trauma, adult PTSD and anxiety disorder. There are also experiential themes of ACOA (being an adult child of an alcoholic).

    I'm hoping this research and testimony can help the 1 in 5 children and adult children either experiencing addiction and abuse, or the adult consequences. 

    ​We can heal ourselves. 

    https://nacoa.org/
    https://adultchildren.org/
    ​https://www.mind.org.uk/

    THIS IS A CHAOTIC AND PERSONAL ACCOUNT, PLEASE ALLOW FOR FREE THOUGHTS, EMOTIONAL EXPRESSION AND POETRY. 

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© 2020 Paul Sinclair 
  • BLACKFLAME MOVIE
  • TRAUMA Reflections
  • about
  • MAKING OF